Week Three 2011 - People are afraid of what they want, of their desires. They stopped listening to their hearts, to their souls. And now they have their eyes, ears and minds set on whatever is left, whatever is easy to follow - led by the media to live in the shadow of their idols.

I can't imagine what has happened to me. I find myself changing rapidly. A new simplicity is dawning over my already simple mind.

Things I believed in are not making sense to me now and I want to spend less time on being that person and more time on being - just being authentically just merely human. The faithful in me is saying let some of it go, less is more.

If what I let go is important, I might lose myself into an abyss of doubt, or I flounder into a deep oblivion of
worthlessness.

Seriously, those thoughts though are not coming to my mind as I go through the day, only now when I write did they come up and so I write them down. What I feel is lighter, easier, and healthier than anything I have done.

This week I walked through the Malaysian Rainforest. Awe-inspiring is an understatement. You have not seen the earth that God made until you have walked in the shadows of the great rainforest and heard the the overpowering noisy nature and wilderness sing. To say that God is in us, that God is everywhere, is okay, but when you walk in a rainforest, I swear, when you are inside a rainforest you feel like you are inside God.

I am changed, I am growing and I am found.

2011, Week Two folks - when you wish for something, the Universe hears you and helps you make it happen. Just dream it and want it and then there is no holding the rivers back.

A new beginning awaits me, you and everyone when the year starts. Two weeks ago we were joyful and anxious with excitement at the front of a new horizon.

New things are bound to happen, they must, shouldn't they? Two weeks can't change that, because things have started to happen, those that are hard to face and others that are not.

For me, hard to face is looking me firmly in my face. Is it that I wished it so long that it had to just happen, or that I hated to think that it will turn up eventually and now, here it is.

A lot of us have dams in our lives behind which we love to be, because it is safe, or maybe it is not safe but safer then what we might face were we to take the tumble down the razor sharp blades of the turbines and shoot ourselves into a place that we can't deal with. But then who knows, the freedom of being away from that old fish pond into new fresh waters might be a blessing. So here I go, I am taking the plunge.

I am taking the plunge because I was pushed, actually. Just because I can't see the future doesn't mean I have to wait for it to reveal itself, I can make my own outcome, can I not? And I did and it showed me that I can be freed from the dam, I can fly out and get to where I want when I want.

I am liking this.